Here is our list of jokes for work.
Jokes for work are puns or other comedic comments to share with colleagues. Examples include funny jokes about the office or joke of the day ideas. The purpose of these jokes is to break the ice and make coworkers laugh. Jokes for work are also known as “puns to tell coworkers” and “clean jokes for work.”
This article is similar to icebreaker jokes for meetings, conference jokes, and April Fool’s Day activities.
This list includes:
- wordplay jokes for work
- puns to tell coworkers
- funny jokes about the office
- joke of the day ideas
- clean jokes for work
- witty jokes for the workplace
- story jokes to make colleagues laugh
Here we go!
Wordplay jokes for work
- Why did the computer take up gardening? It wanted to improve its root system.
- How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
- Why did the scarecrow become a successful manager? Because he was outstanding in his field.
- What did one wall say to the other wall at work? “I’ll meet you at the corner.”
- How do you organize a space party? You planet!
- Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged!
- Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
- What do you call a factory that makes good products? A satisfactory!
- How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it.
- Why did the bicycle fall over at work? Because it was two-tired!
- Why did the magazine go to therapy? It had too many issues.
- What did one hat say to the other? “Stay here, I’m going on ahead!”
- Why did the grape turn to the mushroom for advice? It was in a bit of a jam.
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
- What did one plate say to another at work? “Lunch is on me!”
- What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.
- Why did the banker switch careers? He lost interest.
- How does a snowman get around? By riding an icicle!
- What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!
- What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
Puns to tell coworkers
- What do you call a fish wearing a crown? A kingfish.
- Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.
- How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut!
- How do you make a lemon drop? Just let it fall.
- What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
- What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
- What did the left eye say to the right eye? “Between you and me, something smells.”
- What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
- What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
- Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
- How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
- Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had the drumsticks.
- What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit? A blood orange.
- What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work? A can’t opener.
- What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
- What’s a computer’s favorite snack? Microchips.
- Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It was feeling crumby.
- How does a bee brush its hair? With a honeycomb!
- How does a scientist freshen their breath? With experi-mints.
- Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
Funny jokes about the office
- Why did the employee get fired from the calendar factory? They took a day off.
- My boss asked me how good I was at making spreadsheets. I told him I Excel at it.
- Why did the can crusher quit his job? Because it was soda pressing.
- Always give 100% at work. 12% Monday, 23% Tuesday, 40% Wednesday, 20% Thursday and 5% Friday.
- I like jokes about stationery, but rulers are where I draw the line.
- There are two kinds of people in the world: those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.
- My boss told me that as a security guard, it’s my job to watch the office. I’m on season 6, but I’m not really sure what it’s got to do with security.
- An SEO expert walks into a bar, bars, pub, tavern, public house, Irish pub, drinks, beer, alcohol place, drinking spot, place for beer, beer now.
- What’s a photocopier’s favorite food? Paper jams!
- What do you call a manager who can play the piano? A key player!
- My memory has gotten so bad it has actually caused me to lose my job. I’m still employed. I just can’t remember where.
- How do construction workers party? They raise the roof.
- If every day is a gift, I’d like a receipt for Monday. I want to exchange it for another Friday.
- The trouble with being punctual is that nobody’s there to appreciate it.
- I asked the corporate wellness officer, “Can you teach me yoga?” He said, “How flexible are you?” I said, “I can’t make Tuesdays.”
Joke of the day ideas
- Someone stole my Microsoft Office, and they’re going to pay for it… You have my Word.
- What makes a spider such a good computer programmer? It knows all about the web.
- Do you want to hear a construction joke? Sorry, I’m still working on it.
- Why do SEOs love the farmers market? Lots of organic content!
- Why don’t cats like online meetings? Too many mice.
- The past, present, and future walked into a bar. Things got a little tense.
- I love pressing F5. It’s so refreshing.
- What does a baby computer call his father? Data.
- Why are chemists great at solving problems? Because they have all the solutions.
- I gave up my seat to an elderly person on the bus. That’s how I lost my job as a bus driver.
- My boss told me to “dream on” when I asked if I could come to work late tomorrow. I’m looking forward to it!
- Why did the doughnut maker retire? He was tired of the hole business!
- What day of the week is an egg’s least favorite? Fry-day.
- I got fired from the orange juice factory…I just couldn’t concentrate.
- Which rock group has four guys who can’t sing or play instruments? Mount Rushmore.
Clean jokes for work
- Some people eat snails. They must not like fast food.
- Why should you never trust stairs? They’re always up to something.
- What happens to a frog’s car when it breaks down? It gets toad away.
- When an employment application asks who is to be notified in case of an emergency, I always write, “A very good doctor.”
- What does a mathematician say when something goes wrong? Figures!
- What do dentists call their x-rays? Tooth pics!
- What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One is really heavy, and the other’s a little lighter.
- What does a house wear? Address!
- I told my doctor that I broke my arm in two places. He told me to stop going to those places.
- I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I’ll let you know which comes first.
- I was going to tell a time-traveling joke, but you didn’t like it.
- What kind of shoes do bananas wear? Slippers.
- What’s the best way to catch a fish? Have someone throw it to you.
- What’s red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.
- Why aren’t koalas actual bears? They don’t meet the koala-fications.
Witty jokes for the workplace
- Why did the egg hide? It was a little chicken.
- I wanted to buy some camo pants but couldn’t find any.
- Why do we tell actors to “break a leg?” Because every play has a cast.
- Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn? Because he had a great fall.
- Helvetica and Times New Roman walk into a bar. “Get out of here!” shouts the bartender. “We don’t serve your type.”
- A bear walks into a bar and says, “Give me a whiskey and … cola.” The bartender asks, “Why the big pause?” The bear shrugs. “I’m not sure; I was born with them.”
- Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens? All they said was “Bach, Bach, Bach…”
- What did the DNA say to the other DNA? Do these genes make me look fat?
- I finally decided to sell my vacuum cleaner. All it was doing was gathering dust!
- What’s a llama’s favorite movie? Alpaca-lypse Now.
- It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.
- I excel at sleeping. In fact, I can do it with my eyes closed.
- How does a farmer keep track of his cattle? With a cow-culator.
- What kind of shoes do burglars wear? Sneakers.
- Why should you never use “beef stew” as a password? It’s not stroganoff.
Story jokes to make colleagues laugh
- Three friends stranded on a deserted island find a magic lamp. Inside it is a genie who agrees to grant each friend one wish.
“I want to go home,” says the first friend. The genie grants her wish.”I want to go home, too,” says the second friend. And the genie sends him back home.”I’m lonely,” says the third friend. “I sure wish my friends were back here.” - A kid is going to his first day of school. He looks worried, and his dad asks him, “What’s wrong?” Nervous, the kid asks, “How long do I have to go to school for?””Until you’re 18,” says the father. The kid nods and thinks about this quietly. When they get to the front gates of the school, the kid says, “Dad, you’ll remember to come and get me when I’m 18, won’t you?”
- A man takes his sick chihuahua to the veterinarian. They’re immediately taken back to a room. Soon, a labrador walks in, sniffs the chihuahua for ten minutes, and leaves. Then, a cat comes in, stares at the chihuahua for ten minutes, and leaves. Finally, the doctor comes in, prescribes some medicine, and hands the man a $250 bill. “This must be a mistake,” the man says. “I’ve been here only 20 minutes!””No mistake,” the doctor says. “It’s $100 for the lab test, $100 for the cat scan, and $50 for the medicine.”
- A man was driving down the road when a policeman stopped him. The officer looked in the back of the man’s truck and said, “Why are these penguins in your truck?”
The man replied, “These are my penguins. They belong to me.””You need to take them to the zoo,” the policeman said.The next day, the officer saw the same guy driving down the road. He pulled him over again. He saw the penguins were still in the truck, but they were wearing sunglasses this time. “I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo!” the officer said.”I did,” the man replied. “And today, I’m taking them to the beach.” - One day, a man with an elephant walks into a movie theater. “I’m afraid I can’t let your elephant in here, sir,” the manager says.”Oh, I assure you, he’s very well-behaved,” the man says.”All right then,” the manager says. “If you’re sure…”After the movie, the manager says to the man, “I’m very surprised! Your elephant was well-behaved, and he even seemed to enjoy the movie!” “Yes, I was surprised, too,” says the man. “He hated the book.”
- Have you heard the story of the two skunks named In and Out? They lived in the forest with their mother skunk. And whenever In was in, Out was out. And whenever In was out, Out was in .One day, when In was out and Out was in, Mother Skunk said to Out, “Out, I need you to go out and bring In in.”S o Out went out and immediately brought In in. And their mother asked, “My, that was fast! Out, how did you find In so quickly?” And Out said, “It was easy. Instinct.”
- Bill walks into his boss’s office one day and says, “Sir, I’ll be straight with you. I know the economy isn’t great, but I’ve got three companies after me, and I’d like to respectfully ask for a raise.” After a few minutes of haggling, the boss finally agrees to give him a 5 percent raise, and Bill happily gets up to leave.”By the way,” asks the boss as Bill is leaving his office, “which three companies are after you?”Bill replies, “The electric company, water company, and phone company.”
- I visited a café one day with my friends. The waiter recommended that we try their special coffee. We agreed, and soon, the coffee arrived. As we drank the coffee, we realized that it tasted like dirt and mud. Disgusted by the fact, all of us complained immediately. The alarmed server rushed over and said, “Well, sir, it was freshly ground coffee!”
- A wealthy businessman sees a poor man fishing by the river every day. One day, he approaches him and says, “If you worked harder, you could afford a fishing boat!”
The poor man nods and asks, “And then what?”The businessman replies, “You could catch more fish, sell them, and buy a fleet of boats!”The poor man nods again, “And then what?”The businessman, getting excited, says, “You could have a fishing empire and be rich like me!” The poor man smiles, “And then what?” The businessman says, “Then you could relax and fish all day!” The poor man chuckles and says, “Isn’t that what I’m doing now?”
Conclusion
Telling jokes at work is one of the best ways to break the ice. Folks can use jokes to open meetings, relax during interviews, or connect with colleagues. Depending on the situation, you can use short jokes, punny jokes, or story jokes. These messages also make for great email signatures or Slack messages. Any time you want to make a colleague laugh, check out this list for some inspiration!
Next up, here are some articles on team building jokes, icebreaker riddles, and questions of the day.